As long as I can remember, I dreamt of achieving big things. As a kid, I wanted to become a race pilot and beat all records, or the first astronaut to visit different planets. One Christmas, I got a telescope and I spent my nights looking at the moon and stars, knowing the names of all the visible constellations. Another year, I received a microscope and spent all winter examining whatever I could find. I even let food rot, just because I wanted to examine the fungus.
Being bisexual and open about it has been a weird ride so far. Generally, people are very supportive and understanding. But I’ve also faced a lot of criticism, misconceptions, and hate, coming from both straight people and the LGBTQ+ community. These are the 30 most annoying things with regards to my sexuality I have to deal with on a regular basis.
Around 25% of adults suffer from a mental illness. I want to raise awareness about this issue, and help people understand the different aspects of living with a mental disorder a bit better. That’s why I launched a series of guest posts called Mental Health Mondays, where I give other people the opportunity to share their experiences with mental disorders. This week Jessica shares her experience with depression and anxiety.
It seems to be everyone’s goal to be achieve a perfectly happy life, one where there’s only room for positivity, rainbows and unicorns. The body positivity movement, one that should be there to empower us, has made me feel ashamed and disgusted by myself for the times I felt insecure about the way I look. And those promoting overall positivity and self-love have left me wondering what the fuck is wrong with me, for letting a bad day at work get to me when someone else has it worse. When has this weird sense of perfection become the norm? When did we become so obsessed with happiness?
Anxiety is a common illness, one that’s finally being talked about, but still often misunderstood. It’s invisible, and because our fear can seem irrational, it’s easy to tell people to ‘just stop being scared’. But it’s never that easy, because if all it took was ‘just having positive thoughts’ or ‘just stop being afraid’, no one would be suffering from anxiety. That’s why I like using analogies when trying to explain what anxiety feels like because sometimes it’s easier for people to understand fear coming from a horror movie or an abusive partner than fear coming from someone’s own mind.