I’ve been in therapy for almost a year now, and it’s been helping me improve and become a happier person in so many ways. I’m happy I set my fears of being judged aside and took the step last year, and I think everyone should try therapy at some point in their life.
Lately, I’ve been doing really well. I feel like I’m getting control of my life, and feeling more and more confident and happy each day. Working on improving myself and being in therapy has taught me so much the past few months. There’s so much I know now that I wish I knew when I was younger, especially as a teenager. Life will have its shitty moments but they won’t last forever. And there’s nothing wrong with asking for help when you feel lost.
This post is going to be a very personal one, about a trippy experience I had during guided meditation in one of my previous therapy sessions. As soon as I got home I wanted to share it with everyone, and according to a poll I placed on Twitter people were interested in hearing my story as well.
But while writing this post, I felt both excited and scared. And I’ve had many moments where I wanted to erase everything I wrote because it felt too personal. But I decided to publish it anyway, because it’s a good comfort zone challenge, and because talking about mental health is important.
Some people have a hard time imagining what anxiety exactly is or what an anxiety attack feels like. It’s more than just feeling a bit stressed for a test, or feeling scared in a dangerous situation. That’s why I like to describe my anxiety attacks as a crashing computer.
Computers receive input and process that into output. But my computer isn’t always working properly. Sometimes there’s just too much going on. And then the input becomes too much for my computer to handle. So it stops working. It crashes.